Looking back it is clear where I went wrong. I did not understand that it was my attitude, my unique taste for what I was about with respect to fashion, that dictated my lucky success.
Instead I thought it was money, and more money that was the answer.
That's how I lost myself to money in the pursuit of happiness.
Today I know my art is about exploration of my visions, it's about finding out where I stand in this world, it is about giving life to the hidden truths within me. Art is about creating, it's a living process; money is a dead object, its acknowledgement is a declaration of the past; as nice and necessary that it may be, in the realm of creativity it does nothing but corrupt the magic.
Back to my story. Less than 18 months later I felt miserable, working like hell but seeing none of the previous rewards. The money was still there, but none of the fun. In the past when I was designing a shirt, I would ask myself, what do I think is cool, what moves in the fashion world, and how do I want to influence it from my little corner of the world.
Now all I was thinking was "will this sell?"
That shift in my way of thinking made all the difference, and when 6 months later a business associate approached me with the offer to buy my boutiques, I didn't think long about it. I wanted out.
It was a happy ending.
Today I count my blessings. I have tasted financial success at a young age, I have experienced what happens when I let money become the end goal, and I managed to do it before I had any real responsibilities of the world upon my shoulders; I was, in other words, free to leave, learn from my mistakes, and start over.
Today I hold my passion sacred.
That's why, when I find myself with a bit of spare time and a sketchbook, I ask myself: What do I really want to create.
That's exactly what happened last week when I was waiting with nothing to do, two free hours to kill and a sketchbook and a blue ballpoint pen in hand.
This little sketch became the answer.
Once a drawing is finished I might leave it as is, I might turn it into a watercolor piece (as I did with Circus below) or I might transfer the image unto a canvas and turn it into a painting.
I have not yet shared any of my sketches on my blog or in my newsletter because I have beenliving under the impression that no one would be interested in seeing that part of my journey.
But recently I have been given a few nudges indicating the contrary to be true.
So this is what I want to askyou this week.
I want to know if you think she is finished as she stands, should she be turned into a watercolor piece, or should she become a canvas painting?
Let me know what you think!
The Freedom Series
She was a quick ink sketch, but once she was finished I knew I had to turn her into a watercolor creation.
"I struggled with finding my path growing up, caught between an alcoholic father and a system I didn't fit in, I had to learn the hard way to question everything while trusting my own subjective experience in life."
In the Bible Jesus said "Render unto Caesar the things that are Caesar's, and unto God the things that are God's".
I think there is amazing wisdom in that utterance, and I don't mean this in a religious sense, but as something profoundly true about life.
Render unto any given thing, person, or idea the things that belongs to it, that are its due.
My success wasn't a result of money, and more money did not mean more success.
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Quality acrylic paints and mediums are used for all original artworks. Top quality canvas and stretchers are used for both original artworks and canvas prints. Archival inks and quality paper and materials used for all prints. Museum quality hanging wire and attachments are used for all prints and originals. READY TO HANG.
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